Moms of babies born @ hospital & home...

[JulieD]

Do you think there is a difference in your babies' peacefulness? Do you think that the location/method made a difference? Do you think that length of labor made a difference too?

Hmmmmm...

My Stats- homebirth transfer. Logan is not peaceful almost at all. We were in labor for 39 hours (transfered @ 32 hours).

~Julie

[missing]

Can't make the comparison that you're asking for, but I do have some thoughts on this - so please, bear with me.

Owen's pregnancy and birth were both very *easy*. I had no morning sickness, little sciatica, and no major complaints through my pregnancy with Owen - I took yoga, saw the chiropractor for the last few weeks, took my vitamins, etc. My labour was either 4 hours or 50 hours depending on how you look at it. I wasn't really aware of the first part of labour, as I thought it was just more Braxton-Hicks.

The actual birth was quite fast and easy as well - no interventions, no drugs, nothing. I was on my hands and knees, and I pushed for about 45 minutes or so. Owen didn't even cry when he was born - not right away at least.

We had planned a homebirth, but went to the hospital because our midwife was there with another woman in labour.

Owen is a very laid back, easy-going baby. Sure, he has his moments and his days, but in an over-all sense, he's very content.

Now, do I think this had anything to do with his birth ? Yes and No.

I think that MOST of it is just his personality showing through - he seems to be a "let it slide" kind of kid (at 8 weeks). I think having as easy a birth as what he had really made for the transition from womb to outside easier, and that he had less problems getting used to life than some other babies do.

I also think that the fact that he hasn't been seperated me (unless he's with his Daddy while I bath) makes a HUGE difference, as he knows he can trust us to be there as soon as he needs us.

Okay, enough rambling for now !

[Andrea_G]

My $.02

If you've ever read Matthew's birth story you'd know that his birth was quite traumatic for the both of us. I had enough drugs to knock out a horse. Matthew's forceps bruises are noticeable on his 6 week old professional pictures. Well, Matthew has been the most easy going boy from the get-go. Really laid back. His personality is a lot like his dad's. So much so, it gives my MIL the willies!

Now the girls, they have VERY intense personalities. Both of their births were intervention-free. Natalie was born in a birth center. Morgan was at home. They have always been a wee bit colicky and have very short fuses. If I wanted to get really technical, I could say that because Morgan was born in the caul - which would have meant she felt less pressure of the birth - you would think that if birth had any impact on her, she would be the one with a more easy going temperment of the two. But she is NOT! Morgan is a pistol. She is going to give me a run for her money forever. I am so dreading the teen years with her. But I have to confess, they are both just like me. My parents think it's a dream come true.

I have read about the impact of birth on children's personalities. I believe a fair bit of it as well. But I think that the newborn stage is too early to say that THIS is what has attributed to a *permanent* temperment or personality trait. (Michel Odent has done a lot of research on this)

[Andrea_G]

I'm going to reinforce what Johanna said. Don't do this to yourself and think that something that you did caused him to have any personality issues.

All of the research that I have ever read in relation to a baby's birth trauma is more related to VERY traumatic births - high forceps, oxygen deprivation, etc.

Mommy guilt SUCKS! There are going to be many milestones over the next several years that you will just beat yourself up about more than you could imagine - some you could change, some you can't. This mom thing is a tough gig.

[miche]

My first was a cesarean birth and he was not given to me until almost 3 hours after (his daddy was with him and talking to him the entire time though). He is a high needs child all the way! VERY intense still at age 3.

My second was a vbac, but he probably had a more traumatic birth. Immediately after birth he was deep suctioned, then given to me for about 2 mins then taken to the nursery where he was fed glucose water, had his stomach pumped, xrays and furture deep suctioning (he had meconium inhalation and injestion). So I would think that was a lot more traumatic for him than a c-section was. But he is a very very laid back kid. Now at 13 months a bit of a temper is appearing, but NOTHING compared to his brother, and he has a lot more to have to put up with (an overly affectionate brother who doesn't always know his strength).

They just have different personalities because they are different babies!

[JulieD]

:D Thanks for the encouragement... I suppose a little of what I was asking was for guilt's sake. Dag nab it, I wish it would have been different.

BUT, I was mostly asking to see if there really is a connection. I wonder if the way your pg goes makes a difference too. Just wondering minds wanting to know.

Logan is a huge huge blessing to us but with his personality, we are going to wait a long while before having another. He is just the work of a baby x 2 I swear. But of course we love him TONS. (grin)
~Julie

[karin]

I had a very easy pregnancy and a very peaceful birth. Miranda is neither of those! She is very high needs. I call her my velcro baby. We had lots of problems with feeding in the beginning, and I thought maybe once those were resolved, she would be a little easier. Nope! I love her like crazy though. I keep saying the next one will be more laid back because I sure deserve it! :)

[miche]

Karin I said that too! I kept praying that God had just blessed me with my high needs baby first and the rest would be easy. So far so good! I couldn't understand how anyone could get anything done with a baby - Tommy HAD to be held 24/7. Sean was the opposite. He preferred the stroller to the sling. And he LOVED the exersaucer. I actually had to watch the clock so I didn't leave him in it TOO long! I was lucky to get 5-10 mins of hands free time to cook dinner with Tommy and with Sean it would be 30 mins before he made a peep. Even now he goes and hides in another room (under the crib a lot) so he can play alone with a toy! :)

It is nice, and not nice. For starters he doesn't hug me as much as Tommy and I often long for a cuddlier baby! I also think God knew what he was doing when he spaced my kids 26 months apart. Tommy would not have been ready for a sibling at 24 months or even 25. The change those last few months before Sean was born were substantial and he adjusted very well to the new baby. 99% of the time he just adores his brother and there is very little rivalry between them. If anything the baby is jealous of his big brother lately.

[JulieD]

Karin... Lol! Velcro baby - that is so funny! We call Logan Motion man but I think I'm going to steal your name! ;)

I'm holding out hope too! Please Lord!
~Julie

[djk42]

Just my opinion, but I think that pregnancy has more affect on babies than birth. The stress levels of the mother over a long period of time have more influence than the stresses on the baby in the course of one day. Personalities are in-born and not caused by the mother in any way. My high-needs child was a stressful pregnancy, home labor and short hospital birth. While pregnant I was taking 24 credit hours to finish school before #2 was born, my husband was gone two nights a week, we lived in a duplex with an abusive man and his screaming wife (both had children that came on the weekends from previous relationships), and I had a one year old boy. Weeks before her birth we moved into a new home and my nagging mother-in-law guilted me into helping, causing me to pull a muscle in my lower stomach area. Trust me, the last three months of pregnancy were ten times worse than her little three hour birth. :)

[ArmyBratMom]

Big difference between my kids. With kay, i was induced, and had nubane, and was traumatized myself.
With anthony, it was very easy going. I took my time, did it the way i wanted, and was very peacefull with it.
Kay was a horror. From the second she was born.
Anthony was not. He was constanly at peace.
Anthony is growing slowly, just like keyrah did... and their skills are developing along hte same timeline, but keyrah was a montrous baby. She cried constantly, was always ill (which i attribute to not being bf) and she enver slept.
Anthony sleeps like a champ, is healthier, and you either have to hurt him or really upset him for him to cry.
I had an easy rpegnancy with both of them, untilt he end with kay... but i defiantely had more stress with anthony, with dh laeving for kroea, and not having a docotr and all...
I dunno if it is caused by that, but it is amazing ot look at the differences.